Need to vent

[FloatingFeather]

Hi @BlueBay,

I'm really sorry that things are so hard for you at the moment. Do you have someone that you can talk to or be with so you are not alone?

I really hope that your doctor calls you back today. It's great that you are reaching out for support.

Please know to call the crisis lines if needed:

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467

If in immediate danger: 000

Please take care of yourself @BlueBay - I know many people care about you on the forums and are here to support you.

Best wishes,

FloatingFeather

[Emelia8]

I hear you @BlueBay and I am so terribly sorry you are having to go through this.

I don't know what to say, I feel so useless in your sphere of helplessness.

I really hope that your Dr can get back to you at some point, and that he is able to help you get through this.

In the meantime, would it help to speak to an online counsellor do you think?  Just someone to talk to and speak of everything you are currently going through right now may help.  I am really sorry I cannot help, but I know you are strong and resilient.  I know if anyone can get through this, you can.

Emelia 💕🌸🍀

[BlueBay]

Thanks a lot @Emelia8 for your support. 

I don’t know what to say except that - today is no better. 

im struggling with so much lately. Had blood tests this morning for a whole range of things incl diabetes (which could explain the tiredness and 2-4 toilet trips during the night)

@Emelia8 im just tired. Tired of this life. Living in extreme financial distress. I don’t know how much more I can take before crashing. 

@FloatingFeather @tyme @grayhorn @BPDSurvivor @Shaz51 @tyme @hanami @Former-Member @Snowie @Eve7 

[Jynx]

Hey @BlueBay, been a little while. Sorry to hear that things are so dang overwhelming for you right now. 

I know the feeling of, sometimes no matter how much you hope for a better day than yesterday, things still suck. And waiting on blood test results can be oh so horrible too! I'm waiting on some too at the moment and it is rough. 

I'm glad you're here though, reaching out to your forums fam. We got your back through these tough times! 

What have you got on for the rest of today? Is it rainy where you are too? 

[BlueBay]

Hi @Jynx I miss talking to you. It’s sunny here so I really should take jersey for a walk. But she won’t walk with me alone. After hubby has his coffee we’ll go around the block together. 

I feel so flat depressed angry scared anxious. 

I just want to curl up do nothing forever. I feel I’m a burden on my family so I feel I shouldn’t be around anymore because of the horrible guilt I feel. 

i don’t know what to do anymore. It feels I try but get slammed down pretty quick with something else. And I’m beginning to not care anymore about trying. Because there’s no hope.  Can’t see it. 

[Snowie]

Hi @BlueBay 

I'm sorry to hear things are hard for you at the moment.

You show so much strength. Am here for you hon.

Sending lots of love and hugs your way 💜💜

[Jynx]

@BlueBay I really hear you, that you are in the thick of the darkness right now. Have you been able to get onto the SANE chat at all today? Might help to be able to talk to someone. Cos as much as you might feel like a burden, you are always, always worth time and care and support. I'm sure your family would tell you the same. 

I hope that you do get to go for a nice lil walk, that sounds really lovely! 💜

[BlueBay]

I don’t think I’m worthy of anything @Jynx 

I might give the online chat later on 

I feel like giving up. 

Did take dog for a walk 

[Jynx]

Maybe that's your brain being really mean to you @BlueBay ... and what if people really do value you? I know for a fact you are a valued member of this community. Maybe it won't make that harsh critical inner voice go away entirely, but it might help to shush it for a little while if you remind yourself of the ways you are valued by your loved ones and community. 

Glad to hear you had a little walk, and I hope you do jump onto chat, it might be super helpful 💜

[grayhorn]

@BlueBay 

Hi my friend, I’m so sorry things are tough from so many angles. The good thing is you’re onto it. However, please please please know that this too shall pass. In 5 years you’ll look back at this time and realise how strong you really were and how much love you generated from those near and distant. Health issues and housing issues, each entirely stressful on their own without ganging up. 
As a sole parent of 2 teenagers, I faced eviction due to the rental I was living in being sold, and a gross shortage of rentals in the area. Broke and with no support network  I was stressed to the max, thought it would be time to buy a tent, but we got through. You have an innate ability to connect with others. Support is there. I believe in you. Try and focus on one thing that give you pleasure, for me a fragrant yellow rose. You’re talented and lovable. Be kind to yourself.