hi @NikNik , @Dax_dog and new friend @elainec
Thanks for thinking of me. I'm still feeling shellshocked - you recall I left my home about 3 weeks ago now. Found a nice little flat that I keep spotless. Lovely to have control of my environment. I can see the floor @Dax_dog! All of it! Hate to think what the house looks like now without me there. Friends of mine have rallied around me and hubby's around him.
The idea was always that I get myself out of there so I could get myself together, get counselling for my depression and anxiety and then, feeling stronger, try to support him. But I can't even think about going back without dismay. Hubby started out bargaining, promising me the stars then getting angry and blaming me for it all: "cos I let him get away with it for so long" and expecting me to fix it. Point blank refuses to have counselling of any sort. I realised I was only still in the marriage because I considered myself his carer. Not a good situation for a man who categorically refuses to think he needs any kind of help.
I asked him to stop ringing me and give me space. I had one week eventually of golden silence but tonight he started ringing me again and all I can do is stare at the ringing phone feeling sick.
Where does my responsibility for him start and end?
Sorry for a downer of a message. I wish I had Dax_Dog's resilience and sense of humour.
Missy
